Date December 21st 2018 / Time 12:24AM / Status Not Recording
Location The Wylde Residence – New York City, New York

Exhaustion doesn’t begin to cover the way I feel right now. One miserable day to round out a miserable two weeks… Ever since Horizons.. Ever since that night when Gabriel and Eden disappeared.

I just can’t believe Eden’s gone.

I can’t believe I just got home from her funeral.. And she’s gone. Just gone.

I step into the condo, sighing as I close the door behind myself, leaning against it – questioning on whether or not I even want to move from this spot. I’m tempted to just slide down the wall and try to sleep here.. But then I hear the low hum of the television from the living room, drawing me in there where I see Joe sitting on the couch, half asleep.

“Hey..”

I say softly, moving over to the sofa and sitting down beside him as he sits up.

“Hey..”

He replies with a yawn, laying his head back on the couch and turning his face towards me. I sigh quietly, and shake my head.

“Didn’t expect you to still be up.”

I can’t lie. It’s been nice having him here.. Having someone to come home to. I absolutely hate the circumstances that brought him to my place, not to mention the sadness that I see in his eyes.. But It’s nice having him here. It’s nice knowing that when he was in need, he came to me… Because I sure as hell need him now just as much.

“Just wanted to make sure you made it back okay..”

I shrug and sit back on the couch, laying my own head back.

“Well, I’m here.. Physically.. Mentally, I’m not sure.”

“I understand that.”

I nod my head, sighing again. We’ve both got so much on our minds lately and it’s not fair. I glance over at him, watching the outline of his face as he watches the ceiling. I’m so tired, so sad but.. There’s something relaxing about watching him, having him here… being in his presence. But in watching his face, I see how worn out he is.. I see the guilt and his own sadness..

That I don’t need to be adding to.

I pull my eyes away and shake my head, sitting up.

“You know what? I’m sorry.. I shouldn’t be putting all of this on you. You didn’t even like Eden or care about the fact that she’s… Well, right.”

I close my eyes and sigh.

“Like I said, it doesn’t really matter anyway and.. I’m sorry.”

The corners of my eyes start stinging again, putting my hands up to my face.

“Luce..”

He replies quietly. I feel him sitting up beside me.

“I didn’t like her and no, I guess I really don’t care much about her death…”

My chest tightens as I hear that but I know that’s his opinion and he’s just another person who I’m sure doesn’t understand in the slightest why I feel the way I feel about not only Eden’s death, but Gabriel’s disappearance. Can’t really expect him to get it… Guess I really can’t expect anyone else to get it either.

“But..”

My eyebrows raise and I glance over at him.

“For some reason.. She was important to you and for that reason alone – It’s important to me.”

I feel a tear slip out of my eye, and I reach up to wipe it away.

“I.. I appreciate that.”

I say, whispering.  He’s so sweet, so kind… Maybe a bit of an asshole sometimes, but I’m glad I get to see the softer side of him… Kind of like how I got to see the ‘human’ sides of Gabriel and Eden.  I’m glad that each and every one of them saw something in me that brought out that side, regardless of how long it took to finally let it show.

I glance back up, our eyes meeting again and instantly I’m lost in those greenish hues of his.

It’s in this moment I realize how utterly and deeply I’m in love with him.. And that thought sends my stomach into somersaults.

For a few moments, neither of us look away. There’s nothing stopping us.. Nothing to keep this from happening…

“Joe.. I…”

I love you… I can’t see myself without you…

So much I want to say, yet I’m unable to.

“I..”

My chest tightens and I don’t know what to do. I panic and bring myself back up to my feet, raking my hands through my hair.

“I should probably go to bed… Long day…”